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| Our skit was doomed from the start, having to follow Ramses, the singing chien. He is a French-speaking Coton de Tulear. |
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| The announcers on the left, eaters sitting, coaches standing behind, and the referee riding the tension of the competition. |
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| A dispute about form: Fuho (on left) eating with Rakusu turned backwards! An Oryoki Olympics scandal that will be debated for years to come! |
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| The ref carefully measures each eater's Oryoki set: Are the bowls at the proper distance? The chopsticks aligned properly with the spoon? A tape measure is required for the exactitude of the Oryoki Olympics. |
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| Bansho scores a foul: Interference with Opponent's Bowl. The Penalty: Lose a chopstick. |
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| Eyebrow to eyebrow. |
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| An amazing rice-eating routine, bending the laws of space and time, to the tune of "Chariots of Fire". |
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| The Stone Women Dancing cheerleaders! "Gimme an M! Gimme a U!" |
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| Slow kinhin off the field. |
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| Cleaning the spoons -- one glimpse of spoon by the referee could mean instant defeat! |
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| Fuho (eater on right) beginning to feel a little self-satisfied at his near-perfect Oryoki performance.... |
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| He is immediately disqualified! The call? The Stink of Zen! That smug sense of knowing what you're doing. There's no place for that in oryoki! |
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| Our skit was further upstaged by Goldie Gold: An over the hill star of stage and screen "of a certain age and thus beyond repute". Oddly, she has never been seen in the same room with Jan Chozen Bays... |
5 comments:
that was great, i was guffawing out loud...that's GOL for you tech types.
i absolutely loved that you have a drag queen in your zendo. it touches my sparkly heart.
I am gobsmacked! Now you know my propensity for commentary that pushes the precepts to the edge.
So, I ask you, What next?! Kinhin soccer? Heart Sutrergy? Kannongyo disco?
I certainly hope so!
(Well done, my friend!)
this is hilarious!!! Yay!!! And even more yay is that this was done by POPULAR demand - which means I am REALLY POPULAR! Good news for all.
Those cheerleaders are the best!! :D
It was SO MUCH FUN! Here are some other funny quotes from the announcers:
"There’s been some pretty tough trash talk coming out of the Chopstick Champions on Twitter leading up to the games here today..."
"Yes, referring to one’s opponent as a “rice bag” might normally be seen as outside the limits of right speech, but in the lead up to this competition, anything goes."
"There are very exacting measurements and proportions that must be followed for each bowl, the chopsticks, spoon, and scraper. Just a hairsbreadth’s deviation, and they are surely out of tune."
"That ref doesn’t look too impressed."
"He’s looking not just for precision. He wants to see each movement reveal the competitor’s true face before his parents were born in every moment."
OK I'm totally confused, but it looks like a hoot!
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